10 Online Dating Tips for Women

Online Dating Tips for Women & Single Moms

Dating seems to get harder and harder everyday. Traditional dating is not as popular as it once was, mainly because it’s hard to meet new people. Meeting dates through friends, coworkers, college, etc. is not always possible. Everyone seems to have their own little circle of comfortability. The older you get, people don’t easily open their groups to accept new friends and acquaintances. It’s easy to get comfortable with those you know and already have a good rapport with.

That’s great, but it does not help you meet new people. Your chance of finding a date becomes really slim. Organically meeting someone new at a coffee shop or at a bus stop is hard. With laptops, cellphones and music blaring in one’s ears, striking up a conversation with a cute stranger is not so easy. That leads to Online dating. Its a way for likeminded singles to meet and set up dates. But if you’re just starting out, you may need these 10 online dating tips for women.

1. Safety First

Never give out personal information. This could be your last name, home address, place of work or personal phone number. Finding someone today is extraordinarily easy. Be sure your date is real, safe & sane before sharing any type of sensitive information. 

Meet up during the daytime if possible. Make sure it’s in a public place that has at least a handful of people present. Public places are optimal if they have a camera system, that way if anything were to happen, it would be caught on camera and easier to identify the person. 

Always alert someone of where you’re going and at what time to expect you back. Also share with them some details about your date.  This presents a safety net for you. If for some reason you are going to be late or change your location at the last minute, make sure to update your friend or family member so they don’t become concerned, but also so that they always know your location. 

Make sure you are not followed. Especially, if meeting in person made you uncomfortable in any way. You can stop at another public location, such as grocery store or mall. You can let your date leave first before you leave. If you feel like the situation is unsafe, I would recommend driving directly to the police station. 

2. Paid Sites Over Free 

Now that that’s out the way, lets talk about finding a good website/app. When you start online dating, you may want to try a free website to test the waters. While it’s not impossible to find a good match on a free website, it’s much harder. Or…at least it was for me.

Since it’s free and anyone can sign up, you are likely to have more people who aren’t taking dating seriously. There will be more people testing the waters and you’re more likely to find abandoned accounts. I didn’t have much luck on free websites, like Plenty of Fish. Most people I met seemed to be on there just to be there. Even if I found someone who “seemed” nice enough, nothing came out of it. 

Paying means you both put effort into dating.  This is a great starting point, because all relationships take effort. Most likely if you’re paying for a monthly membership, you’re at least serious about  finding a date.

All sites are not made equally.  Make sure you join a website that has a good amount of people in your area. I met my husband on Zoosk, which was amazing, because he barely used a computer at all. Zoosk has many features that other dating websites don’t. At the time, it had the most people for my area. Other sites you can try are Match, eHarmony & Christian Mingle. 

3. Hold Off on Your Children

Another important online dating tip for women is hold off on your children. While it’s a personal choice, I’d recommend holding off on having your children involved with your online dating process. No matter how nice someone appears, remember that at first we all put our best foot forward to impress someone new that we’re interested in. Wait until you know the person is safe and that you’ve seen their true personality before bringing your kids into the picture.

Don’t bring your child on your date. For some this can be tempting. You may feel more comfortable with your child around or you may not have a babysitter that day. Nonetheless, taking your child can place him/her in an unsafe situation as well as make it harder to interact with your date. It’s a good chance your child will distract you both from really establishing a connection.

Try to wait until you get pass the first few dates and establish that you both are wanting to be build a relationship before involving your kids.

4. Talking on Phone/Video Chat 

Before meeting someone in person, make sure you talk on the phone or video chat with them. Texting or emailing someone doesn’t give you a true feel for a person’s character. Most people also don’t talk the way they text. Therefore, the connection established by the written word may fizzle out when you speak in person. Some people can be more charming through text. After all we have time to write, think, erase and write again before we send our message. When talking, we don’t have that chance to edit ourselves. 

Speaking to your potential date will help you discern if this person is interesting enough to meet and may also give clues to if they’re safe to meet up with. A phone call will help you get to know the person more beforehand. You can often determine the person’s voice, age group, sense of humor, manners and gender from an phone call. 

Video chatting also ensures that you are texting or emailing the person in their online profile picture.

5. Be Realistic 

Online is a big place. Be realistic of your wants and needs and don’t get lost in the online platform. Sometimes you can get caught up and ignore these things. For example…if you aren’t willing to move far from your home…don’t contact people across the country, much less across the world.

If profiles seem to good be true, they often are. Be wary of overly professional, edited “supermodel” photos. That being said, make sure you’re showing your best self in your photos, but nothing that doesn’t look like you.

6. Meet Up Quickly

Meet up within 2-6 weeks of first messaging a potential date online. Don’t waste your time! If the person isn’t for you, it’s better to know as soon as possible. Don’t get locked into an online relationship with no opportunity to bring this relationship in person. Imagine spending a year or more talking to someone to find out they aren’t who they say they are. If you’ve watched Catfish, you know what I mean.

7. Texting Behavior 

If you are messaged anything that isn’t a real conversation, please ignore it.

These ridiculous introductions include….but aren’t limited too… “hey, how’s it going?” “how you doing?” “Hi” “What you up to?” “Where do you live?” “You’re hot!”

No, no, no! Guys who are seriously looking and interested will have already read your profile before contacting you. Often you will be able to tell by their message. A good starter message is more like….

“Hi Jane. I’m happy I came across your profile…I see you like Marvel movies. I’m a big fan myself. I honestly haven’t missed one. Which is your favorite?”

“Hi Jane, my name is Tom. I hope you don’t mind me saying, you’re very beautiful. I see we have a lot of music in common. Who’s your favorite artist?”

Texting: If you are trying to establish a relationship with someone, they should be putting effort in by initiating conversations and texting you back. You’re worth it! If you are finding it frustrating or hard to communicate, that person is not for you. This behavior says they don’t care, are too busy with other things in their life, or are involved in another relationship. Move on when you feel this type of behavior is present.  

8. Cultural & Other Differences 

Keep an open mind. The best person for you may be someone who looks nothing like you or grew up in a totally different neighborhood. Online you can reach much further, so be open to getting to know different people. You never know who you will hit it off with. Before my husband contacted me, I had my dating site search set that I would never have found him for limiting my criteria based on age and distance. My husband was 15 miles outside of my search criteria so he never came up in my search results. Lucky that he found me. 

9. Make Sure Morals & Values Are on Point 

Before you start falling for someone, check that you have some important common ground. Some people date to have a fling, others date for a long term boyfriend others date for a marriage and a lifetime friend. This is important! If you want long term and marriage, it’d be very difficult with someone who only wants to hook up or plans on keep their options open.

Single mommas, make sure your date likes children and would enjoy having a child in their life. Falling for someone who doesn’t want the responsibility & joy of children would be terrible. 

10. Have fun 

I know…I’ve said a lot. But I’m almost done!

Dating can be stressful, especially in a time of Covid-19. Try to have some fun. If you go into this thinking you get to meet new people on your journey to find that special guy, it will be a good time. Love will find you, just remember it may not always happen right away. 

I hope these 10 online dating tips for women help you!

Wishing you good luck and safety on your online dating journey!

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